Wednesday, January 7, 2015


how can you see the good in all this?
i am bored and useless, always
i drank three beers
on the walk home last night
i was wearing the t shirt you gave me
and i've got nothing to give


ever feel like there are two tv screens
like where your eyes used to be?
and all you see are the same things on repeat?
like movie scenes, playing endlessly
like recurring dreams

ever feel like you've waited your whole life
for an ending you won't like
and then just accept it?
ever spend all day staring at the floor?
vaguely wanting more
but more or less ignored


i saw my future start to grin
right before it split in two
and you were going down on me
while i was going down on you
and i thought
"i have half a mind
that i don't mind
if we're picking sides"

i know what you want to hear
and i know what i could say
to make you go away

every side eyed glance
every differing point of view
encircles the periphery
that's closing in on you
calculate the dissimilarity
between the person who you want to be
and somebody you'll never meet
someone who can't meet you

just thought "i have half a nevermind"


this is my brain folding in on itself
look, i have no use for it now
it's so dull!
this is the part in the movie
where the people watching
fall asleep in their chairs
they're nodding off!

i don't mean to seem too deficient
but these are my inhibitions
i closed my mouth
but they still found
some way of slipping out


we exchanged numbers
in a mexican supermarket
but then i lost hers
and she never called me
and then this morning
at the bus stop
this guy was singing something in spanish
sometimes i wonder
what people think when they're by themselves
i mean, the not so tangible things


people talk with their hands,
make faces, look like animals

no affect or you're just mumbling
drinking whatever people hand you

and it seems like time stands still anymore
you realize that you dont' feel too well
you put on sunglasses and try to block it out

it takes a long time
to get to the middle
from where you are now
overheard pcs. of conversation
you can't quite make out
and there's a black spot
growing in the bottom left side of your mouth
imagine somebody with steady hands
trying to wrestle it out

recorded 1/6/15 at 381 e oakland using 'tascam portastudio' 4 track
cassette out soon via 'gnarly as i wanna be' (
yuze boys is a punk band from columbus, oh

yuze boys is winston hightower, kyle bergamo, jeff kleinman, alex mussawir

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